Relationship Remix - Rebuilding Trust
Relationship Remix - Rebuilding Trust
Rebuilding trust with difficult people
Tuesday October 21st 2025
We started a discussion this week about how do we rebuild trust with difficult people. Yesterday we looked at what the Bible calls evil people, fools, and the wise. We are going to focus on the first, evil people within life. Which is a hard conversation to have, but take a look at what scripture says.
What are we talking about when we talk about an evil person. Let me give you some pointed statements in defining an evil person, then I will give you an summary.
An evil person is arrogant, hard, hurtful, driven by self-interest or preservation (which we can all be at times). An evil person is heartless, cruel, unfeeling, lacks sorrow when someone suffers and lacks joy when one is happy. Evil person lacks moral boundaries, devoid of a conscience, swaggers to its own inner rhythm, destructive, yet can be deceitfully subtle. Evil people intend to harm you, not for your good. You feel like a prisoner in their words, actions and thoughts.
Scripture puts it this way, John 10:10, “the thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy.” I know that is a reference to the devil, notice if you take the “d” off of devil, you get evil. Which means, anything that tries to steal from me, not simply monetarily, or kill me, not my physical body, not destroy me or me things. But steal, kill, destroy my joy, my confidence, God’s truth is evil. Anything that tries to steal, kill, destroy my identity, my relationships, my reputation is evil.
Proverbs 24:1-2 and 8-9- Do not envy the wicked, do not desire their company; 2 for their hearts plot violence, and their lips talk about making trouble…. 8 Whoever plots evil will be known as a schemer. 9 The schemes of folly are sin, and people detest a mocker.
Notice the words used, not only for an evil person, but even a fool. Be cautious to be in relationship with them (desire their company), their hearts plot violence and lips make trouble, plots evil and a schemer.
King Solomon is giving us an awareness of people like that within our life and a caution of how to live with them. (If you want to read a bit more, jot down 2 Timothy 3:1-9.)
Let me give you this statement of an evil person. Anyone who consistently chooses to live with a hard heart. Their heart is filled with arrogance, control, deceit, destruction, moral decay, lack of empathy all the while with an unwillingness to change.
I don’t know if this description strikes a cord with you or not? I don’t know if there is some offense you are taking because there are words that have been described of you? Or maybe you know someone or others that fit this description. But let me take a moment and illustrate it a bit more.
Remember, this isn’t just a momentary lapse of judgement where you are hard or arrogant, or lack empathy in a moment. This is a consistent, repetitive hard heart with little to no softening.
For example, as I mentioned last week about our family “joke” about being right the majority of time, which isn’t true, but it was something that needed to change in our household. An evil person, spouse, parent would absolutely insist on being right and any attempt to correct them would then lead into a barrage of insults, put downs, belittling, by the time they were done going off, you are left emotionally and mentally torn down.
Or maybe you feel absolutely alone, because the person that you question to be evil, you know shows a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde approach. Doesn’t matter if you are at home with them or work one-on-one with them in the office. They show others one thing and then show you something completely different. To the point where no one would ever believe you, because they are that hard and cold towards you. They could threaten you, insult you, intimidate you, then call you a liar if you share it with any one else.
Obviously, any type of abuse fits in this way, the double down on the fact that the abuse isn’t acknowledged or you are made to feel like you did something wrong.
I know this may be a hard faith challenge to go through and we will get move towards hope in the next few days. But it is something to pause enough and seek where you are at and where your relationships are at. This isn’t about being self-righteous or negligent of relationships. This is about redemption, restoration, reconciliation.
If you read through this and see yourself in the description, maybe today is a day you can begin to allow your heart to soften. Confess your hard heart and seek forgiveness.
For others, if you see yourself in a relationship with someone who is like this, how can you step into prayer for them and wisdom for yourself. Remember, correction (rebuke) for a wise person is love.
No matter where you are at, sit with this song as an encouragement I Surrender
What are we talking about when we talk about an evil person. Let me give you some pointed statements in defining an evil person, then I will give you an summary.
An evil person is arrogant, hard, hurtful, driven by self-interest or preservation (which we can all be at times). An evil person is heartless, cruel, unfeeling, lacks sorrow when someone suffers and lacks joy when one is happy. Evil person lacks moral boundaries, devoid of a conscience, swaggers to its own inner rhythm, destructive, yet can be deceitfully subtle. Evil people intend to harm you, not for your good. You feel like a prisoner in their words, actions and thoughts.
Scripture puts it this way, John 10:10, “the thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy.” I know that is a reference to the devil, notice if you take the “d” off of devil, you get evil. Which means, anything that tries to steal from me, not simply monetarily, or kill me, not my physical body, not destroy me or me things. But steal, kill, destroy my joy, my confidence, God’s truth is evil. Anything that tries to steal, kill, destroy my identity, my relationships, my reputation is evil.
Proverbs 24:1-2 and 8-9- Do not envy the wicked, do not desire their company; 2 for their hearts plot violence, and their lips talk about making trouble…. 8 Whoever plots evil will be known as a schemer. 9 The schemes of folly are sin, and people detest a mocker.
Notice the words used, not only for an evil person, but even a fool. Be cautious to be in relationship with them (desire their company), their hearts plot violence and lips make trouble, plots evil and a schemer.
King Solomon is giving us an awareness of people like that within our life and a caution of how to live with them. (If you want to read a bit more, jot down 2 Timothy 3:1-9.)
Let me give you this statement of an evil person. Anyone who consistently chooses to live with a hard heart. Their heart is filled with arrogance, control, deceit, destruction, moral decay, lack of empathy all the while with an unwillingness to change.
I don’t know if this description strikes a cord with you or not? I don’t know if there is some offense you are taking because there are words that have been described of you? Or maybe you know someone or others that fit this description. But let me take a moment and illustrate it a bit more.
Remember, this isn’t just a momentary lapse of judgement where you are hard or arrogant, or lack empathy in a moment. This is a consistent, repetitive hard heart with little to no softening.
For example, as I mentioned last week about our family “joke” about being right the majority of time, which isn’t true, but it was something that needed to change in our household. An evil person, spouse, parent would absolutely insist on being right and any attempt to correct them would then lead into a barrage of insults, put downs, belittling, by the time they were done going off, you are left emotionally and mentally torn down.
Or maybe you feel absolutely alone, because the person that you question to be evil, you know shows a Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde approach. Doesn’t matter if you are at home with them or work one-on-one with them in the office. They show others one thing and then show you something completely different. To the point where no one would ever believe you, because they are that hard and cold towards you. They could threaten you, insult you, intimidate you, then call you a liar if you share it with any one else.
Obviously, any type of abuse fits in this way, the double down on the fact that the abuse isn’t acknowledged or you are made to feel like you did something wrong.
I know this may be a hard faith challenge to go through and we will get move towards hope in the next few days. But it is something to pause enough and seek where you are at and where your relationships are at. This isn’t about being self-righteous or negligent of relationships. This is about redemption, restoration, reconciliation.
If you read through this and see yourself in the description, maybe today is a day you can begin to allow your heart to soften. Confess your hard heart and seek forgiveness.
For others, if you see yourself in a relationship with someone who is like this, how can you step into prayer for them and wisdom for yourself. Remember, correction (rebuke) for a wise person is love.
No matter where you are at, sit with this song as an encouragement I Surrender
Posted in Daily Faith Challenges
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